Virtual Confetti

I haven’t been to Blockbuster in years.  Not because I don’t watch movies, but because I’ve switched to Netflix, HBO, and Cinemax.  They’ve closed down several stores in my area, and the one that remains is not well stocked.  But when you need a movie for a film study, and Netflix doesn’t have it instantly online, then you make due with the resources that are available to you.  Rummaging through the glove box and center console of my car, I found the little key-fob card thing with my Blockbuster bar code.  It will have to do.

I’m not sure why I dread Blockbuster so much, but I do.  Every time I go in, I feel like I’m walking through a Goodwill thrift store wearing a tuxedo, and someone I know will point and say, “Haha! You’re RENTING! Go back to 1988, VHS Boy!” It just seems so dirty to me.  Unethical. So non-vogue.  Besides that, they never have the actual movie you’re looking for, unless you’re into farting, burping, teen starlet comedies, of which they have several copies of each.  I refuse to rent them, not only because they’re mind-numbingly atrocious, but because they reek of teen farts and burps.

The movie in question was Rope, which is more than a mere classic from Alfred Hitchcock.  Hitchcock was known for producing some low budget films that didn’t look low budget.  35mm film stock comes in reels of 1000 feet.  At 90 feet per minute, this gives the director approximately eleven minutes of film per reel.  The way the story goes, Hitchcock ran each reel to its full eleven minutes so as to avoid having a few seconds of unused (wasted) film at the end.  Every eleven minutes, he either faded to black at calculated moments or deliberately placed black objects in the camera’s path so as to allow the next reel to seamlessly splice in and pick right up.  Genius, considering the precision timing involved.

Blockbuster? Oh, they didn’t have Rope.  But they did have another Hitchcock classic, Lifeboat. There I stood, waiting in line next to parents holding farting, burping comedies for their teens who, incidentally, were still at home, too embarrassed to be seen in a Blockbuster with their parents.  Years ago, I would be hiding my passé movie selection from the others, dodging random snickers.  Classics?  Grandpa’s movies? This was business, though, which now takes on a “cooler” context.  And that’s when the sales droid amused me…

DROID:  Oh, your card is expired.  For fifteen dollars, I can renew it for a year.  Actually, for ten, since this first one is free!

ME: Yeah, I only come in once a year.  Renew? Can’t I just rent it without the big renewal thing?

DROID: Yes, for $5.47, but you can renew it for ten.  And it’s good all year!

ME: Look, I’m a producer and just need to watch it for a film study. And you didn’t have the exact movie I needed anyway, so this one will have to do.  Normally I’d get it mailed from Netflix, but I need to watch it this weekend.  I only come in once a year, so I don’t need a subscription.  And I already feel dirty for coming here. And old. And unloved.

DROID: But it’s only four dollars more.

*crickets*

ME: Here’s six dollars. Knock yourself out.

This explains why they’ve closed the other Blockbusters, and why this one survives only as a backup to depleted garage sale inventory.

You’re in luck!  This guide will tell you who and what to vote for, no matter where you live or what initiatives are on the ballot!

I predict the 2010 Fall election to be… a yawner.  Yes, I’m a patriot, and yes, I believe in democracy and voting.  But seriously, campaigns are spending and popularity contests, not demonstrations of public representation.  (This is nothing new.)  The worst of it are the sheep who only watch television ads, monitor single news sources, and believe mail brochure propaganda.  Obviously, these mediums are paid for by special interests, and money is democracy’s worst enemy.

The worst part of the voting process is the lack of political education.  This is especially worrisome with today’s youth — who are tomorrow’s political future — and tend to believe what they hear because it’s easier than learning and understanding real information.  As an American, it is essential to put effort into understanding what and who you’re voting for, otherwise you might as well hand over all your belongings and liberties, because they obviously aren’t worth protecting.

Information is a dangerous thing.  I can tell you a complete lie, and depending on my credentials, you may just believe me.  Maybe I’m a celebrity you find entertaining, maybe I have a list of causes you believe in, or maybe I simply say things that make you feel appreciated and important to humanity.  But they can be lies, specifically crafted to appeal to your emotions and self worth!  Always check facts, always obtain information from multiple and competing media organizations, and always do your homework.

So who or what do you believe? Here’s Jefferson’s recommendations and “Quick Start Guide” on how to vote, without actually telling you how to vote:

1. Shred all ads that arrive by mail.  They’re obviously sent to you by candidates or organizations with agendas.  Even when they seem to have a good case for smearing the other guy, that other guy will have some response that makes the accusation seem questionable.
2. Likewise, ignore all TV and radio ads.
3. Read, watch, or otherwise consume news from multiple media sources.  Yes, news is usually biased, so monitor several sources and understand the biases of each reporting agency and how it affects their programming.
4. Assess the list of the causes, organizations, politicians, or individuals that you believe represent your ideals and philosophies.  Then, go to their websites or otherwise obtain information from them about who and what they support.  This will tell you which politicians support those causes, and which ballot initiatives are most friendly to them.
5. After reviewing the candidate or ballot initiatives for the causes you support, compare them, and determine one by one which ones “win” over the others.  Sometimes this is hard, because you may believe strongly in two causes with opposing views.  Do your best, and compromise where needed.
6. Vote according to your conscience.

So the bottom line is… be educated, be American, and vote!

The Flower on the Pond
by Jefferson Feil

The wind breaks through the garden
Shaking flowers to the ground
Looking closer, I beg your pardon
Atop the pond, one flower is found

Two weeks later, I returned
Those flowers had withered away
But the one on the water, unturned
Well nourished, it survives today